GIT LOVE HOME

This article is a follow-up to the article “Being the Parent of a Child with Developmental Disabilities”. The articles discuss some of the things a parent of a child born with Down syndrome can reasonably expect but are not normally told about. Although the articles discuss children with Down syndrome, many of the points outlined in these articles, also apply to parents of most children born with special needs.

As a parent of a child born with Down syndrome, you can expect:

1. To lose a few friends, since a lot of people who do not have a child with special needs do not understand, or fit into your life anymore (their loss, true friends will be there for you).
2. Your life and your spouse’s life to change drastically (there can be some tension but it can also and most likely will bring you closer together).
3. To get ticked off once in a while with your child’s service providers (can be with a doctor or therapist).
4. To change one or more of your child’s service providers (if a provider does not click well with you, change them since you need to feel comfortable with the person who has a major stake in your child’s overall well being).
5. Your child’s healthcare providers to get information wrong or misdiagnose something (this is where your instincts and gut feelings come into play).
6. To hear someone say, “I have good news and I have bad news” (for example, “the bad news is your child has cataracts and the good news is that they are in both eyes” — believe it or not, better to have them in both eyes than one eye).
7. Everyone to volunteer to babysit but not be qualified to babysit a child with special needs (yes, special needs require ‘special handling’ — find nice ways to say thank you but no thank you).
8. To join a local support group in your area (expect to make some great friends — you will meet some great people and realize that you are not alone).
9. Someone to mention the word “autism” if you child’s development delay is significant (do not be alarmed, this will actually provide you with access to more services).
10. To see your child’s therapists more often than you see the majority of your family members (you might have 3-4 therapy sessions scheduled with different providers per week; some will be twice a week).

Raising kids is one of the most challenging tasks on this planet mainly because kids do not come along with an instruction manual. Every single youngster is unique, and suggestions given by other folks will not work in the same way. Yet, you’ll find specialists who have made it simpler for parents and demonstrated to them easy methods to eliminate child behavior difficulties to ensure that tranquility can reign once more within and beyond the family home.

Some youngsters could possibly be diagnosed with health problems that influence the way they react, or a few could possibly be struggling with illnesses that have not been considered yet. Even so, there are steps that you may take for you to obtain the best possible tendencies from your youngster and not hate bringing them outside the home for family events.

When you scream at a small child whenever she or he behaves badly, she / he will nevertheless have the attentiveness that he or she desires from you, despite the fact that it isn’t the good sort of attention. That undesired behavior will carry on if you reply in a negative way because the youngster is just too young to know what positive or negative attention is whenever she / he receives it from a grownup. One particular method for preventing this issue would be to underrate his / her negative tendencies. But then, if the tot is causing injury to either herself or himself or other folks, then you have to get them from the specific situation so that the little one can have time to calm down. If necessary, you may keep them under control, but just by holding them sufficiently to prevent them from shifting, but not too tight that they may get harmed in the act.

You will find that placing your little boy or girl in her or his bedroom, a corner of a room or other remote spaces will also work, notably if he or she sees that his or her unfavourable behaviour is not gaining him or her attention. Don’t scream at the child; just pick the kid up or direct him or her to an isolated spot and give your little child ample time to think about what he or she has done. A good way to gauge the number of minutes that the child will stay away from everybody else is by using his / her age. For example, if your child is six years of age, then you ought to let her or him be for 6 minutes.

When a deaf child is first diagnosed with hearing loss, parents make the decision whether to raise their child with speech or sign language or both. Whether your deaf child now communicates through listening and speaking, lipreading, signing or a combination of these, here are some tips which will improve communication for you both:

• Get your child’s attention before you speak to them, by a gentle touch on the arm.
• Establish eye contact.
• Face your child directly so they can lip-read what you are saying. Do not speak with your back to your child or from a distance.
• If your child can hear better with one ear, stand on the ‘better’ side.
• Speak as clearly as possible in a natural way and at a moderate pace. Don’t over exaggerate mouth movements as this will make lip-reading more difficult.
• Don’t shout!
• Make sure your mouth is visible. If your mouth is covered, your child will be unable to lip-read what you are saying.
• Reduce background noise.
• Use short and grammatically simple sentences, give instructions one step at a time, avoid abrupt topic changes, and explain when you are changing the topic.
• If your child does not understand what you said, rephrase it.
• Use lots of gestures, visual cue, facial expression and body language to support what you have said.
• If necessary, write the message down in simple language.
• Check comprehension by asking for feedback.
• Recognise that your child can hear and understand less when they are tired or ill.
• Be patient, positive and relaxed when speaking to your child.

Above all, it is important to remember that there isn’t one correct way of communicating with your deaf child. Every child is different. Some will gravitate towards signing; others towards speaking; others will like both. Your child will let you know what they feel more comfortable doing. Whatever helps them best communicate is the best way for your child. Be open-minded and flexible to your child’s individual needs and they will love you for it!

There are many branches of psychology that suggest ways to change human behavior. The ADD/ADHD community generally follows the idea of rewarding desirable behavior and either ignoring and/or presenting consequences for undesirable behavior. Again, you know your child best. Some kids take well to praise while others seem react well by avoiding consequences at all costs. I will present you with a list of some ways to reward, ignore, and create consequences. Try them to see which work best for your child.

Rewards:

· Reward your child with verbal praise, hugs and kisses, or some quality time with someone or doing something instead of material objects.

· Change rewards as often as you can. ADD/ADHD kids will react well to the stimulation of a variety of rewards.

· Since many ADD kids are impulsive, make sure that rewards are immediate rather than delayed.

· Reward your child with something that is meaningful to him (i.e. extra time playing with Dad at night, extra video game time).

Consequences/Ignoring:

· Your child should know the potential consequences in advance so that he or she isn’t surprised when the consequence is delivered. This could prevent a potential meltdown.

· Know your child’s ‘triggers’. Don’t hand out a consequence that will devastate your child.

· Have your ADD/ADHD child verbalize what he or she did wrong and what he or she plans on doing in the future to avoid being in this position again.

The best way to incorporate these ideas is to create ADD/ADHD behavior contracts.